Everybody's talking about who they were in a past life these days, and it's always royalty, but let's be honest, how many of us could possibly have been Cleopatra or Julius Cesar? Don't you think that at least a few of us were poor janitors in Louisiana in the 1930s? We can't all have been royalty, but here are five historical figures we wish we were the reincarnation of...
George S. Patton
Besides being a legendary general and a crazy sonofagun, Patton was also something of a poet, focusing on the concept of past lives in some of his work. Through a Glass, Darkly, is written from the perspective of a soldier who has fought and died in every major war, only to be reincarnated once more as a soldier. The idea of an immortal fighter, being reborn every generation or so to serve the common good, is an interesting one.
The King, Elvis Presley
There is probably nobody else in history who has inspired so many impersonators. There's literally an entire industry built around the idea of dressing, sounding and acting like The King. There's nothing these guys would love more than to hear from an expert that they are, in fact, The King, and that's exactly why they do it so well.
Ben Franklin
Benjamin Franklin was probably the most eccentric, oddball and offbeat of the founding fathers. We know him as the inventor of the glass harmonic, the lightning rod, the Franklin stove and bifocals, but what's really fun is all the stories of how he came upon his inventions. The guy was willing to try anything to figure out how electricity worked. The kite story isn't quite how it happened, but there was one incident wherein Franklin wanted to prove to his friends the power of electricity, so he invited them over on Thanksgiving and promised to roast a live turkey in a matter of seconds. Long story short, third degree burns over ninety percent of his body and the turkey went free.
Actress Audrey Hepburn
With so many women wishing they were Cleopatra, you don't hear anyone saying that they were once Audrey Hepburn. She was definitely the icon of grace and beauty in her time, so why not? Maybe she wasn't royalty on the political stage, but she certainly was in world culture. We vote her the woman we most wish would hurry up and be reincarnated already. Not only was she graceful and beautiful, she was charming and funny, and she only grew more beautiful with each passing year as she got older.
Pro Wrestler Andre the Giant
Andre the Giant was crazy, and a lot of fun to be around. He was known to steal horse carriages and go on madcap races across town, and when he drank, there was nobody who could match him. If you're a fun drunk, maybe you were once a giant pro wrestler. Andre was one of those guys where, even though every story would end in a fight with the police, a beer can tossed at somebody's head or someone in the hospital, all of his friends remember him fondly, nonetheless. A real wildcat and a great guy.
George S. Patton
Besides being a legendary general and a crazy sonofagun, Patton was also something of a poet, focusing on the concept of past lives in some of his work. Through a Glass, Darkly, is written from the perspective of a soldier who has fought and died in every major war, only to be reincarnated once more as a soldier. The idea of an immortal fighter, being reborn every generation or so to serve the common good, is an interesting one.
The King, Elvis Presley
There is probably nobody else in history who has inspired so many impersonators. There's literally an entire industry built around the idea of dressing, sounding and acting like The King. There's nothing these guys would love more than to hear from an expert that they are, in fact, The King, and that's exactly why they do it so well.
Ben Franklin
Benjamin Franklin was probably the most eccentric, oddball and offbeat of the founding fathers. We know him as the inventor of the glass harmonic, the lightning rod, the Franklin stove and bifocals, but what's really fun is all the stories of how he came upon his inventions. The guy was willing to try anything to figure out how electricity worked. The kite story isn't quite how it happened, but there was one incident wherein Franklin wanted to prove to his friends the power of electricity, so he invited them over on Thanksgiving and promised to roast a live turkey in a matter of seconds. Long story short, third degree burns over ninety percent of his body and the turkey went free.
Actress Audrey Hepburn
With so many women wishing they were Cleopatra, you don't hear anyone saying that they were once Audrey Hepburn. She was definitely the icon of grace and beauty in her time, so why not? Maybe she wasn't royalty on the political stage, but she certainly was in world culture. We vote her the woman we most wish would hurry up and be reincarnated already. Not only was she graceful and beautiful, she was charming and funny, and she only grew more beautiful with each passing year as she got older.
Pro Wrestler Andre the Giant
Andre the Giant was crazy, and a lot of fun to be around. He was known to steal horse carriages and go on madcap races across town, and when he drank, there was nobody who could match him. If you're a fun drunk, maybe you were once a giant pro wrestler. Andre was one of those guys where, even though every story would end in a fight with the police, a beer can tossed at somebody's head or someone in the hospital, all of his friends remember him fondly, nonetheless. A real wildcat and a great guy.
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